Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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