Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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