She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
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Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
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a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I enjoy the company of your penis
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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