i just made my gag reflex go away.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
