I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
