2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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