This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
