I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize