Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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