her vagine was all disorganized.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
