You really coming over, don't trick.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
