You really coming over, don't trick.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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