her vagine was all disorganized.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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