My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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