I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize