I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
