Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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