What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
