I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
