Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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