I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
