Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
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