This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
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You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
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making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool