He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
