I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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