I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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