I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
