I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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