And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
