wakey wakey hands off snakey
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize