I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.