wrigley field is MILF paradise
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
