i don't like sucking hair
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Just puked most of my soul out..
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
