Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize