Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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