he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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