My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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