Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
