Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
