would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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