I wanna passion pit in your ass
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
