All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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