come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Randomize
