please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
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