ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
