I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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