Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
