I wanna passion pit in your ass
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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