I love watching others lives come down to our level.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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