whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
